Blog Interrupted

I think I have emailed everyone to let them know what is going on here on the home front, but I could have easily missed someone...If I did, forgive me. I've had a lot on my mind lately. I am trying to answer each of your emails personally. Your support is amazing!! I was afraid you might give up on him at this point...thank you for proving me wrong!

As most of you know Kevin went back to rehab yesterday. Last week was a BAD week...emotions were running high. I was partly pissed at him for being so irresponsible and putting others at risk. I was pissed at him for putting us in this situation where he knew we would be apart. I had told him just 3 weeks prior that if he drank again, he couldn't live here anymore. He had to go to rehab or back to his parents. He said at that time he would go to rehab if he drank again. That didn't stop him from trying to beg his way out of it. It was hard last week. Very hard. At times I thought my heart might explode right out of my chest. There were several times when I had to cry out for God to help me because I could not do this on my own. I knew I had to be strong for the both of us. It was easy when I was pissed. It was much harder when I was just sad.

Last week is behind us now. Sunday was no where near as hard as I expected. There was such a peace that went along with leaving him there. This is a different type of rehab. They call it a spiritual boot camp for men with addictions. To be interviewed, you have to attend the church service on Sunday morning and stay after for an interview. The service is what made me know he was at the right place. This place is ran by a couple and the man lived a parallel life to what Kevin has led. This man has now given his life over to God and helping others overcome addictions. Inspiring! I am so relieved that Kevin is there. Now, I just pray he does what he needs to do to get better. The next 30 days may be tough folks. 30 days with no contact - not even by mail. You may have to cheer me up from time to time!!!

I know this is our only chance at a life together, but I miss the Big Bear already. I mean, who is gonna remember to make sure I don't run out of poptarts and Dr. Pepper? :-)

Seriously, keep us in your prayers. I will try this week to get back into my blogging routine. If I have to work through some tough stuff...I'll warn you at the head of the post, so you can skip it if you want!